2020, You Ain’t Cute

 I got a new mask. Do you like it?

If you can’t read it, it says, “2020, you ain’t cute.” I saw it the day it became available, and I hit the “order” button way too fast. 

 If you’ve been missing me here online or at church, there is a good reason for that. A few weeks ago, we were informed that Evan had been directly exposed to the coronavirus at school, and he was going to have to quarantine for 14 days. And when he had to quarantine, guess who else had to quarantine? You guessed it. Me! That meant that we missed three Wednesday nights and two Sundays of church. On top of Evan being at home, I was sick during that time with the world’s worst case of strep throat and a cough that would not let go, which has left me unable to shoot videos. It just added insult to injury.

 

You might be thinking, “Well, that’s no big deal.” For the preacher’s family, it’s a really big deal. Usually I welcome a break from church when we’re on vacation, but we already had a 3 month “vacation” of sorts from church earlier this year. So I was not really looking for another one. 

 

Those two weeks of isolation with no church, no friends, no leaving the house prompted me to order this mask. I am over 2020. I mean done. I want no more of it. I want normal life back. I want to be able to do ministry full force. I want to have parties without the risk of someone getting sick. I want to go to stores without masks. I want to watch the news without feeling like I am being brainwashed. I want to visit my dad, who is now in the nursing home, and be able to give him a hug. And for gracious sake, NO MORE HURRICANES! I am tired of it all. Just tired. Aren’t you?

 

During this time of quarantine with Evan, you would think that me, the preacher’s wife, would have been constantly in the Word and in prayer because I had all this time on my hands. You’d be wrong, I’m sorry to say. At first I was so sick that I could barely stay awake long enough to read my Bible. Once I was well, I was just so demoralized by being stuck at home that Jesus was the last place I turned to for comfort. I have just been in a funk. Missing church caused part of that. But the major problem was that I was seeking comfort from other things rather than God. That was my mistake. In the end, those other things did not satisfy. They did not help me feel any better. And they certainly didn’t break me out of my funk. 

 

I am working my way back into normal life as it is in Phase 3, and my first priority is refocusing myself on Jesus. I have listened to some podcasts, made my quiet time my first task in the morning, and I have been playing the piano and listening to worship music as much as possible. All of these things have helped the cloud over my head to lift slowly but surely. I know and you know that the only way we are going to survive the last 2 months of this year are to fix our eyes on Jesus. The writer of Hebrews says, 

 

“Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every hindrance and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, keeping our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith. For the joy that lay before him, he endured the cross, despising the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider him who endured such hostility from sinners against himself, so that you won’t grow weary and give up.”

Don’t grow weary. Don’t give up. Fix your eyes on Jesus, and we will finish the race of this year well. That is my prayer for myself and for you.

*Mask available here.